The Escapologist (Bar)

Top 10 things you need to know about The Escapologist:

1) Hidden societies and secret handshakes; oh my! Seated in the former home of the Freemasons, The Escapologist is a cocktail bar in Covent Garden steeped in history and mystery; so much of the latter that it's possible to walk straight past the discreet alcove reception without noticing.

2) The Escapologist is a bit of a hodgepodge of sorts: daytrippers will mix with hen parties will mix with theatre-goers will mix with likely lads. Our overlords like it when we all get along, it makes things much easier.

3) From the galactic wallpaper in the loos to the absurdist portraits on the walls (Chameleon-head-man is a personal favourite), The Escapologist certainly looks the part of a slightly bonkers evil lair.

4) Case in point: If the underground setting and dimmed lights still aren't moody enough for you, there's a hidden vault - complete with secret door - that you can hire for private parties. No, I'm not telling you where it is.

5) Change isn't controllable. Ruling the world from the shadows is much easier when things stick to the status quo. This is evident from The Escapologist's cocktail menu, which serves all of the usual varieties.

6) However, true men and women of influence are able to think on their feet - very tasty mystery mocktails can be produced on demand.

7) I say mystery - actually we just couldn't hear the waitress' description over the loud throwback tunes and the bubbling ambience. And the air con. This place will definitely be your kind of jam if you like air con. Perfect for masking discreet conversations.

8) There's a limited menu of pizzas to grab at, but it's probably not best suited to a quiet sit down meal (nor does it aspire to be). The peach, pesto and parmesan combination is the pick of the bunch.

9) If you have a sweet tooth, The Escapologist will also serve you a “Sweetzza”. Yes, these look as awesome as they sound. Yes, you will feel like a child again. Yes, your dentist will become very rich from this. He's probably a Freemason.

10) Diplomacy can be hard. Sometimes you will have to go see some godawful musical in a dingy theatre somewhere off Covent Garden in order to appease the in-laws. Come here first and get sh*tfaced - it'll ease the pain, and you won't be alone....read more