Trailer Happiness (Bar)

Top 10 things to know about Trailer Happiness bar:

1) Plenty of fish.com lied. Hours spent trawling through their site without hooking a single goldfish. Need a plan B.

2) A friend had heard unsubstantiated rumours that Julia Roberts likes to walk along Portobello Market, looking through old books and sipping on expensive lattes. Maybe you might spot her at Trailer Happiness imbibing their famous tiki cocktails?

3) With inflatable dolls and palm trees at the entrance, this quirky London bar is hard to miss. Strolling down, you quickly notice how retro and kitsch this place is: 1960s carpet; retro Hollywood glam murals; and apple green leather swivel chairs.

4) Although no Hollywood actresses in sight, the wonderful server, Rebecca, would definitely be a worthy auditionee to become one. She has elocution and execution.

5) Eye contact. It might be a small issue, but it matters. Rebecca sits with you, makes recommendations and takes orders at eye level, instead of being a prima donna looking down on her hapless clientele.

6) First cocktail she recommends is the Trailer Colada, an exciting twist on the Pina Colada. It comes served in a coconut shell complete with coconut incense. Perhaps Rebecca is trying to remind you that you've forgotten to put on your aftershave?

7) Next recommendation: the prawn dumplings. Probably unlike you, it’s fresh and thin-skinned. However, it’s incredibly slippery, like fishing with chopsticks. Practise, practise, practise at home first with your takeaway chopsticks before contemplating a formal date here.

8) Order the Dia de Los Muertos. Anything that says Ilegal Mezcal and blood orange demands to be noticed. It's breezy, citrus taste will release your tongue-tied mouth and make for more fruitful conversations.

9) The bar is in a dark basement and it might be early post-work on a Friday afternoon, but people keep streaming in. They might be hoping to stumble upon Julia, but they’re more likely after some exotic tiki cocktails. Few places make them as well as Trailer Happiness in London and at such affordable prices.

10) There are still plenty of fish around, just make sure you are looking in the right pond....read more