We blokes aren’t particularly bright when it comes to the opposite sex. We know enough to get by. We realise that standing outside Clapham North or Angel tube stations at 7pm on any given day of the week will result in a constant tide of hot eye candy, but we’re not so smart on the specifics. As in, where do we go to find lots of beautiful girls and sexy ladies in London in one convenient bar, club or restaurant, at one convenient time? Relax lads, Fluid London has done the hard work for you. Here then is a guide to the Top 10 Best Bars, Pubs, Clubs & Restaurants in London to find those lovely ladies. Dress and groom appropriately, and get that winning charism on show! If all else fails, you can always find hot girls at the best strip bars in London.
West End / Bar / Restaurant / Club / Cuisine: British
If you are looking for the most sexy and beautiful girls in London, you'll find your dreams have come true at Stringfellows in Covent Garden. Beautiful girls are in abundance at the world's most famous nightclub; famous for a reason: two lavishly furnished levels, featuring numerous live stages, various seating areas, private booths and Red Rooms, and, of course, the renowned five-star reviewed restaurant serving the best late night food well into the early hours. But mainly because of the delicious ladies.
Mad Hatter’s Afternoon Tea at Sanderson
Fitzrovia / Restaurant / Hotel / Cuisine: Afternoon Tea
Menus are hidden inside vintage books; napkins wrapped with riddles; while teapots adorned with kings and queens; and sandwich plates feature zebras, birdcages, carousels and ticking clocks. Dainty sandwiches; home baked savouries; jam and cream and hot scones; all this plays the backdrop to a whimsical Alice in Wonderland afternoon tea, where hot girls with priorities gather in groups of 3 or more, dressed in their finery, sipping pink champagne. This is a wonderful hidden garden of delights!
Hackney / Bar / Restaurant / Cuisine: Eclectic
Forget what the Pet Shop Boys sang about; it's the East End GIRLS that are the sexiest, most fun, and most likely to actually talk to you in a crowded bar. This spacious canal-side bar is brimming with beautiful ladies, grouped together in jolly packs, dancing, laughing and drinking the night away. Arrive early, grab a pale ale and sit in the middle of the room on a communal picnic bench, chomp down a delicious burger, and bop your head to the killer tunes the DJ is spinning. And wait for the magic to happen.
The Book Club
Shoreditch / Bar / Cuisine: Modern International
Whether its the exposed brickwork, the by-the-carafe wine, or the possibility of ping pong, girls love a good Book Club and this one is mostly frequented by those we label 'Media Types'. Asymmetrical haircuts, boutique clothing, and a massive pair of fek-off headphones. Throw in an Apple Mac laptop and a tendency to talk about perfecting the art of the flat white and you've got it. Tip: arrive early, eat, play pool downstairs, and watch beauty gather around you. You lucky lucky fella!
The Old Blue Last
Shoreditch / Bar /
The indie chick: picture the scene, it's a night out in Shoreditch, you're with your closest compares and you're looking for a spot that offers a potent mix of trend-setting music and low maintenance female specimens. The Old Blue Last is the perfect pick and this notorious East London nightspot remains on the cutting edge of capital's underground music scene. Prerequisites include: dancing like a lunatic, a penchant for strong libations, and suitably coiffed hair. The music nights are usually free, so there's no excuse for not buying one of these gorgeous ladies a drink or two.
Wandsworth / Bar / Restaurant / Cuisine: Gastro
"It's a jungle out there," Randy Newman told us and we can't help but agree. On that basis, The Ship in south London would be our choice of hunting grounds. We make that choice fairly easily, too. You'll come off reasonably better in conversation here than on the dance-floor. The patio area is top of my list, especially as it is without music that sounds like a brain haemorrhage. Real ale and sunshine added to that combo and that's probably the most level playing field that you'll ever get, so The Ship would be our choice to meet someone sexy and smart.
Tooting Tram and Social
Tooting / Bar / Club / Cuisine: Eclectic
A healthy number of the gorgeous gals can be found flaunting their obvious beauty at this stylish south London bar and many of them will be employed within the nursing industry, what with St George's Hospital just up the road. And who ever met a nurse that didn't like to have lots of fun?! Those girls love to drink, dance, chat, sing, and, most probably, snog. What's more, the ladies working BEHIND the bar are also the most alluring you're ever likely to witness working behind the bar.
Shoreditch / Bar / Cuisine: Pizza
Any self-respecting lads' night out involves some form of competitive edge, a full range of alcoholic beverages to sample, delicious fast food, an ear full of big beats to dance along to, and, naturally, large groups of well fit birds. This basement bar, and surprising restaurant, in Shoreditch ticks all those requisite boxes. This is the best place to start your night out in Shoreditch, boys. Grab a bat and start swinging. Pro tip: wear white somewhere on your person and smile lots. The ultra violet lights will help you get your girl.
The Cat and Mutton
Hackney / Bar / Restaurant / Cuisine: Gastro
If you the type of person who has a penchant for ladies who have an air of hipster about them, who wear colourful leggings, cut-off denim jeans, an array of tattoos, faux spectacles, and bright red lipstick, then this east London pub next to London Fields and Broadway Market is THE hotspot for hot ladies. By 4pm on a Saturday afternoon it's positively brimming with beautiful girls who most likely work in PR, fashion, media, or publishing. Plus, they gather in groups and the DJs play until 1am. So lads, get the beers in!
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