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Reviews and contributions written by Michael Payne

Fluid Reviews

Picture of Archipelago, Fitzrovia, London

Archipelago, Fitzrovia (Bar / Restaurant)
“I have looked through the other reviews on this and other websites and am at a loss to understand how anybody could say anything positive about this restaurant, unless they had been paid to do so. In my opinion, it's probably one of the worst places I have ever eaten at, and a classic example of a London rip off: High prices, poor service, lousy food, and cheap gimmicks. The location could hardly be worse: It's tucked away up a windswept side street miles from anywhere, near Goodge Street Station. Things don't improve when you arrive. The place is the size of a broom cupboard, and the lack of space is made worse by the fact that it's crammed full of what can only be described as junk. Carved African heads juxtaposed with plastic Buddahs, and the like. There is no theme here: It looks like the contents of someone's attic. The result is an uncomfortable eating experience, where you find yourself crammed up next to your fellow diners. If you are broader than average, forget it! The food is also hardly memorable. I have had much better at my local greasy spoon. I had a (so called) Mexican dish, one of the only vegetarian options, and received a tiny packet of tasteless rice wrapped in vine leaves, and a very uninteresting, miniscule portion of vegetable stew. This was served on a large plate, placed on top of a piece of slate, on top of a piece of wood. This was all about presentation, and not food. The service was also a joke: It took them 3 hours to serve 3 courses! They didn't seem very interested in us, despite the fact that, as a group of 12 people having our Xmas office party, the bill was not much short of £1000. In short, avoid this rip off establishment like the plague, unless you like overpriced, tasteless food, or you are a moron who likes to pay through the nose for nothing. ”
Atmosphere: Value: Quality:
Michael Payne, London 02 Jan 05

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