Quaglino's Review

Book a table at Quaglino's

Best for: Splashing out on a fancy meal in a famous London restaurant if you’re searching in Mayfair and Piccadilly.

Great: Friendly staff.

Even now. Even after everything that has happened in this city over the last couple of years. A city that stood as epicentre to a decade throughout which the worthy and responsible were encouraged by feeble, sycophantic governments to cower in bewildered veneration at the vulgar excesses of city bankers, only to be consequentially lumbered with a debt of billions, borrowed from banks to save banks from the mess the banks made.

A city in which it was revealed that our esteemed rulers and overlords, feeling so impoverished by earning a measly three times the national average wage, were using every changing of a light bulb, every housing of a duck, and every film ordered for their partner to jerk off to, as an opportunity to fleece yet more money from the pockets of their unsuspecting underlings.

A city that is still smouldering from a violent plague of consumerist scavengers who, raised on the distorted ethos that demonstrable wealth (no matter how ill-gotten or unstable) is the sole measure of societal value, used ‘desire’, ‘require’, and ‘deserve’ as interchangeable synonyms in their insatiable rampage towards acquisitive glory.

Yes, even now, in a city that has borne witness to the most reprehensible consequences of the idolisation of wealth over cultural worth, there are people who still revel in that ineffable feeling of self-satisfaction that comes from spending money on things other people can’t afford, regardless of whether the quality of the purchase is in anyway commensurate to the cost. If you are one of these people, who - as Oscar Wilde put it - know the price of everything and value of nothing, Quaglino’s may well be the perfect restaurant for you to brazenly fritter away your fifties on deliciously overpriced mediocrity, under the illusion that it in any way impresses anyone other than you and your culturally bankrupt kind.

Like Harrods a mile or so to the west, Quaglino’s was once the epitome of London glamour, wealth and taste. Now - again like Harrods - it appears stuck in an identity crisis, dithering at the crossroads between tradition and modernity, refined exclusivity and accessible excess, uncertain which way to face when its only discernable appeal is its name and location.

Initially, and superficially, the venue still makes a very striking first impression as, descending the gently illuminated staircase from the ground floor entrance, its sprawling metropolis of tables and extravagantly lit floral meridian gradually reveal themselves beneath the sky-scraping glass gabled roof.

However, a quick aperitif in the adjacent pre-dinner bar soon started to dissolve such impressions of majesty. As the schizophrenic playlist veered erratically from bebop to house to trip-hop to dinner jazz – a perfect musical encapsulation of Quaglino’s existential indecision – I found myself looking through the fancy dress and seeing the venue for what it more closely resembled: a cross between an industrial-size potting nursery and a glass-roofed slaughter house.

Appropriately, the attendant clientele that night were a similarly mixed rag-bag of misfits. Businessmen hoping to clinch their deal before the coffees arrive, tourists in end-of-holiday attire burning up their pounds before flying home, out-of-towners sharing a fancy pre-theatre meal in one of the only London restaurants they’ve heard of: very few people contributing to the sense-of-occasion that you’d hope for in a restaurant of such expense and renown.

And while our service was flawlessly efficient, the menu was indistinctive and the fare equally underwhelming. My partner’s rarebit starter stood comfortably above the mere average – a restaurant really is in trouble if it can’t get cheese-on-toast right – but it was conspicuously alone in doing so. In particular, my overcooked lobster was far too chewy, while the accompanying French fries were almost as perfectly chilled as the wine.

Last year, I dined at Quaglino’s with a gaggle of fellow Fluid foodies, and found the experience thoroughly delightful from start to finish. The mild disappointment that I took with me into the Piccadilly evening this time around might therefore have been partly fuelled by the anticlimax of not having been treated to the same high-standards again.

However, it does genuinely seem that Quaglino’s, uncertain of its role in an ever-evolving London restaurant scene, is simply ambling too aimlessly to fulfil the lofty expectations that its former reputation and high prices will inevitably engender amongst its visitors. Pandering to the moneyed mindlessness of corporate clients and rich tourists may be a sustainable business model. After all, bankers are still earning the same exorbitant incomes they did before they took a collective shit on the rest of the country, and they still need places to show it off. But for the rest of us who define ourselves by more than merely the number of digits in our bank account, there are a myriad of other restaurants in London in which those hard-earned digits can be more rewardingly spent.

...read more

Alistair Martin 02 Sep 2011

Special Offers at Quaglino's

• Lunch Bar Menu: 1 course and a glass of wine £10
• Pre-Post Theatre: 2 courses and a glass of wine £18.50
• Q Champagne Menu: 2 courses and a glass of Champagne or a Q club cocktail £19.50

Customer Reviews for Quaglino's

Average (based on 5 votes): 5 Atmosphere: Value: Quality:

The following customer reviews are not endorsed by Fluid London and are simply those of users who wish to publish their independent experiences of Quaglino's.

“Decent but well overpriced - certainly gone down hill since I last went here.”
Atmosphere: Value: Quality:
Andy, Mill Hill (1 years 8 months 22 days ago)

“Quality is fantastic - the food really is divine and although it's not cheap you pay for what you get, and it's quality! The sommelier is very helpful, very young looking but every recommendation was perfect. If you want to treat yourself to something special this is the restaurant.”
Atmosphere: Value: Quality:
Sue, London (2 years 11 months 10 days ago)

“There is a sense of occasion when you come to Quaglino's, especially walking down their marble staircase - classy. Try to book a table in the centre as you can see everything that's going on. Service and atmosphere here is superb. If you like eating in a stylish venue then Quaglino's is the place for you!”
Atmosphere: Value: Quality:
Priscila, London (6 years 8 months 9 days ago)

Show all user reviews for Quaglino's

Quaglino's Opening Hours

Additional Information

• Cuisine Type: European
• Average Price: £40.00
• Dress Code: Not Specified
• Group: D&D London